,PET] ,&]SON & ,CO4

,HE _H (FICES 9 ,SYDNEY1 N S _M YE>S
  AGO1
,& 8 %+LE BORE ! LEG5D ,8,PET] ,&]SON
  & ,CO40'1
,B 8 R1L "N 0 ,C>E.S1 Z ! FELL[S
  "U/OOD--
,& 8 RELATIVES DECID$ T HE WASN'T ANY
  GD4
',TWAS _! G5TLE T;GUES T BLA/$ ANY
  ,8"*0' HE _H-
,HE 0 FOND ( BE] & LEISURE--&! ,CO4 0
  J Z BAD4
,X 0 LIMIT$ 9 NUMB] 6A UNIT1 0 ! ,CO4--
',TWAS A BOSOM *UM ( ,PET] & 8
  ,*RI/IAN "N 0 ,JOE4

',TIS A CLASS ( M5 2L;G+ 6^! S\L-
  =SAK5 YE>S3
,?IRD-RATE CANVASS]S1 COLLECTORS1
  J\RNALI/S & AUC;NE]S4
,!Y >E N"E V %A2Y1 !Y >E N"E V
  SPRUCE--
,GO+ *E];LLY & C>E.SLY & SMOO?LY 6!
  DEUCE4
,"S >E W&]]S 0PROFES.N1 ,8TURN+ UP0'
  & G"O Z SOON1
,TRAVELL+ SECOND-CLASS1 OR /E]AGE 7:5
  X'S *1P !Y G SALOON72
,FREE F ,8I/S0' & ,8ISMS0'1 TR\#D LL
  02LIEF OR D\BT--
,LAZY1 PURPOSE.S1 & USE.S--KNOCK+ R.D
  & HANG+ \4
,!Y W TAKE :AT !Y C GET1 & !Y C GIVE1
,GOD AL"O "KS H[ !Y MANAGE--,GOD AL"O
  "KS H[ !Y LIVE6
,!Y >E NE>LY ALW H>D-UP1 B >E *E];L
  ALL ! :ILE--
,M5 ^: 5]GY & TR\S]S WE> \ SOON] ?AN _!
  SMILE6
,!Y1 NO D\BT1 L U1 >E HAUNT$ 0!
  BORE"S ,8IF0' OR ,8MI<T0'1
,B _! <O/S >E <O/S ( "DLI<T--!Y >E M5
  :O LIVE AT NI<T6

,PET] MET Y )! -IC SMILE ( "O :O "KS
  Y WELL1
,& IS MI<TY GLAD 6SEE Y1 & HAS GOT A
  JOKE 6TELL2
,HE CD LAU< :5 ALL 0 GLOOMY1 HE CD
  GR9 :5 ALL 0 BLUE1
,S+ A -IC S;G & ACT X1 & APPRECIATE
  X1 TOO4
,ONLY CYNICAL 9 CASES ": 8 [N SELF 0
  ! JE/1
,&! HUM\R ( 8 GD Y>NS MADE AT"O;T =!
  RE/4
,SELDOM S]I\S--DO+ BUSI;S J Z 'TW]E A
  FRLY GAME--
,C>DS OR BILLI>DS--NO?+ GRAV]4 ,&!
  ,CO4 0 M* ! SAME4

,!Y TRI$ "EY?+ & NO?+ 'TWIXT ! %OVEL
  &! PRESS1
,& 7 M OR LESS SU3ESS;L 9 _! V5TURES
  --MO/LY LESS4
,ONCE !Y RAN A C.TRY PAP] TILL !
  PLANT 0 SEIZ$ = DEBT1
,&! LOCAL S9N]S *UCKLE OV] D+Y COPIES
  YET4

,!Y'D BE5 "? X ALL & KNEW X 9 ! L& (
  ,BILLS & ,JIMS--
,US+ ,PET]'S [N EXPRES.N1 !Y _H BE5 9
  ,8V>I\S SWIMS0'4
,N[ & !N !Y'D TAKE AN (FICE1 Z !Y
  CALL$ X1--MAKE A DA%
,96BUSI;S LIFE Z ,8AG5TS0'--"S?+ N
  REQUIR+ CA%4
7,Y C ALW FURNI% *1PLY1 :5 YR CA% OR
  CR$IT FAILS1
,)A PACK+-CASE1 A HAMM]1 &A P.D (
  TWO-9* NAILS--
,&1 MAYBE1 A DROP ( V>NI% & SI5NA1
  TOO1 = T9TS1
,&A SCRAP OR TWO ( OILCLO?1 &A Y>D OR
  TWO ( *9TZ74
,!Y WD PULL !MVS TGR1 PAY A WEEK'S
  R5T 9 ADV.E1
,B X N"E LA/$ L;G] ?AN A MON? 0ANY
  *.E4

,! (FICE 0 _! HAV51 = !Y LIV$ "! :5
  H>D-UP--
,A ,8DAILY0' =A TA# CLO?--A JAM T9 =A
  CUP2
,& IF ! L&"L'S BAILIFF HAPP5$ R.D 9
  "TS L ^!
,& SEIZ$ ! (FICE-FITT+S--WELL1 "!
  WASN'T M* 6SEIZE--
,!Y WD L1VE HM 9 POSSES.N4 ,B AT O!R
  "TS !Y %OT
,! MOON1 & TOOK AN (FICE ": ! L&"L
  KNEW !M N4
,& :5 MORN+ BR"\ ! BAILIFF "!'D 2
  NO?+ 6BE SE5
,SAVE A PIECE ( BEVELL$ C$> ": !
  T5ANT'S PLATE _H BE52
,"! WD 2 NO SIGN ( ,PET]--"! WD 2 NO
  SIGN ( ,JOE
,TILL ANO!R PORTAL BOA/$ ,8,PET]
  ,&]SON & ,CO40'

,& :5 "TS 7 LOCOMOTIVE1 BILLI>D-ROOMS
  & PRIVATE B>S--
,SPICY "PIES AT ! CAFE--L;G CAB-
  DRIVES 2N ! />S2
,PRIVATE PICNICS D[N ! ,H>B\R--%ADY
  CAMP+S-\1 Y "K--
,NO "O WD H DR1M$ 'TWAS ,PET]--NO "O
  WD H ?"\ 'TWAS ,JOE6
,FREE-&-EASIES 9 _! ,8DI7+S0'1 :5 !
  FUNDS 2GAN 6FAIL1
,BOSOM *UMS1 CIG>S1 TOBA3O1 &A CASE (
  ,5GLI% ALE--
,GLORI\SLY DRUNK & HAPPY1 TILL !Y
  HE>D ! ROO/]S CR[--
,&! L&LADY & NEI<B\RS MADE -PLA9TS AB
  ! ,CO4
,B T LIFE6 X MI<T 2 LIK5$ 6A RECK.S
  DR9K+ S;G1
,= X C'T G ON = "E1 & X N"E LA/$ L;G4

                99 99 99
,DEBT-COLLECT+ RU9$ ,PET]--P TALK$ HM
  R.D TOO (T1
,= 8 HE>T 0 S(T Z BUTT] 7&! ,CO4'S 0
  J Z S(T72
,HE WD *E] ! HA7>D MISSUS1 & HE'D
  TELL H] N 6FRET1
,& HE'D ASK ! WORRI$ DEBTOR R.D ) HM
  6H A WET2
,HE WD ASK HM R.D ! CORN]1 & X SEEM$
  6HM & H]1
,AF EA* ( ,PET]'S VISITS1 ?+S 7 B"R]
  ?AN !Y W]E4
,B1 ( C\RSE1 X WASN'T BUSI;S--ONLY
  ,PET]'S C>E.S WAY2
,& P]H X PAYS 9 H1V51 B ON E>? X
  DOESN'T PAY4
,!Y GOT H>D] UP ?AN "E1 &1 6MAKE X
  WORSE1 ! ,CO4
,W5T M (T5 R.D ! CORN] ?AN 0 GD = HM
  6G4

,8,I MI<T LIVE10' HE SD 6,PET]1 ,8B
  ,I HAV5'T GOT ! N]VE--
,I AM GO+1 ,PET]1 GO+--GO+1 GO+--NO
  RES]VE4
,EAT & DR9K & LOVE !Y TELL U1 = TM WE
  MAY DIE1
,BUY EXP]I;E--& WE B"\ X--WE'RE
  EXP]I;ED1 Y & ,I40'
,!N1 )A WE>Y MOVE;T ( 8 H& ACR 8 BR[3
,8,! D1? ( S* PHILOSOPHY'S ! D1? ,I'M
  DY+ N[4
,PULL YRF TGR1 ,PET]2 'TIS ! DY+ WI%
  ( ,JOE
,T ! BUSI;S _W % HON\R ,PET] ,&]SON &
  ,CO4

,8,:5 Y FEEL YR LIFE IS S9K+ 9 A DULL
  & USE.S C\RSE1
,& 2G9 6F9D 9 DR9K+ KE5] PL1SURE &
  REMORSE--
,:5 Y FEEL ! LOVE ( LEISURE ON YR
  C>E.S HE>T TAKE HOLT1
,BR1K AWAY F FRS & PL1SURE1 ?\< X
  GIVE YR HE>T A JOLT4
,%UN ! POISON BR1? ( CITIES--BILLI>D-
  ROOMS & PRIVATE B>S1
,G ": Y C BR1! ,GOD'S AIR & SEE !
  GR&EUR (! />S6
,F9D AG & FOLL[ UP ! OLD AMBI;NS T Y
  _H--
,SEE IF Y C RAISE A DR9K1 OLD MAN1
  ,I'M FEEL9' MI<TY BAD--
,HOT & SWEET5$1 NIP O' BUTT]--SQUEEZE O'
  LEMON1 ,PETE10' HE SI<$4
,&1 :ILE ,PET] W5T 6FET* X1 ,JOSEPH
  W5T 6SLEEP--& DI$
,)A SMILE--ANTICIP,N1 MAYBE1 (! P1CE
  6-E1
,OR A JOKE 6TRY ON ,PET]--OR1 P]H1 X
  0 ! RUM4

                99 99 99
,PET] /A7]$1 GRIPP$ ! TA#1 SW]V$ Z "S
  OLD DRUNK>D SW]VES--
,AT A GULP HE DRANK ! TO4Y1 J 6BRACE
  8 %ATT]$ N]VES4
,X 0 AW;L1 IF Y L4 ,B !N HE _HN'T "T
  6?9K--
,ALL IS NO?+6 ,NO?+ MATT]S6 ,FILL YR
  GLASSES--D1D MAN'S DR9K4

                99 99 99
,YET1 6%[ 8 HE>T 0 N ( HUMAN DEC5CY
  2REFT1
,PET] PD ! "UTAK]4 ,HE GOT DRUNK ON
  :AT 0 LEFT2
,!N HE %$ "S TE>S1 HALF-MAUDL91 ON !
  GRAVE ": LAY ! ,CO41
,& HE DRIFT$ 6A T[N%IP ": ! C;Y
  FAILURES G4
,":1 ?\< HAUNT$ 0! MAN HE WAS1 !
  WRECK HE YET MI<T BE1
,OR ! MAN HE MI<T H BE51 OR 0EA*
  SPECTRE (! ?REE1
,&! DY+ ^WS ( ,JOSEPH1 R++ "? 8 [N
  DESPAIR1
,PET] ,8PULL$ HMF TGR0' & HE />T$
  BUSI;S "!4

,B 8 LIFE 0 V L"OLY1 & 8 HE>T 0 V
  SAD1
,& NO HELP 6RE=M,N 0 ! -PANY HE _H--
,M5 :O MI<T H BE51 :O _H BE51 B :O 7
  N 9 ! SWIM--
',TWAS A T[N ( WRECKS & FAILURES--!Y
  APPRECIAT$ HM4
,!Y WD ASK HM :O ! ,CO4 WAS--T QUE]
  -PANY HE KEPT--
,& HE'D ALW ANSW] VAGUELY--HE WD SAY
  8 "PN] SLEPT2
,T HE _H A ,8SLEEP+ "PN]0'--JE/+ :ILE
  8 _S BROKE--
,& !Y GR9N$ ABV _! GLASSES1 = !Y TOOK X
  Z
A JOKE4
,HE WD %\T :ILE HE _H M"OY1 HE WD
  JOKE :ILE HE _H BR1?--
,NO "O SEEM$ 6C>E OR NOTICE H[ HE
  DRANK HMF 6D1?2
,TILL AT LA/ "! CAME A MORN+ :5 8
  SMILE 0 SE5 NO M--
,HE 0 G"O F \ ! (FICE1 & 8 %+LE F !
  DOOR1
,&A B.D>Y-RID] JO7+ \ ACR ! NEI<B'R+
  RUN
,0 ATTRACT$ 0A "S?+ T 0 BLAZ+ 9 !
  SUN2
,& HE F.D T X 0 ,PET]1 LY+ P1CE;LLY
  AT RE/1
,)A BOTTLE CLOSE 2S HM &! %+LE ON 8
  BR1/4
,WELL1 !Y ANALYS$ ! LIQUOR1 & X WD
  APPE> T HE
,QUALIFI$ 8 DR9K ) "S?+ GD = SETT+
  _SS FREE4
,?\< 'TWAS PLA9LY SELF-DE/RUC;N--0''TWAS
  8 [N A6AIR10' !Y SD2
,&! JURY VIEW$ HM SADLY1 & !Y F.D--T
  HE 0 D1D4