#D3 ,CODEP5D5CY3 ,GU>D+ ! ,SECRET

  8,I ?9K ,I C TALK AB X40
  ,L>GE1 D>K EYES SQU9T DET]M9$LY Z
TW5TY-TWO-YE>-OLD ,LORI ,M>*ANT--N H]
R1L "N--CAT*ES H] BR1? AF BASKETBALL4
8,MY BRO!R & ,I >E PROBABLY AB Z CLOSE Z
Y C GET 62+ CASES ( CLASSIC CODEP5D5TS40
  ,6PROTECT ,LORI'S ID5T;Y1 LET'S SAY
,I'M 9 ,D5V]1 EV5 ?\< ,I'M N4 ,LET'S SAY
,I'M ON ! CAMPUS (A PROM95T S*OOL4 ,I'VE
W&]$ 2T CAMPUS BUILD+S 6F9D ! OLD GYM ":
AFN BASKETBALL PRACTICE IS KEEP+ /UD5TS'
M9DS (F UPCOM+ MIDT]M EXAMS4
  ,! OLD GYM IS COOL & D>K EXCEPT =!
LI<T$ C\RT ) XS SQU1L+ PLAY]S & SQU1K+
%OES4 ,! PLACE HAS T FAMILI> SMELL (
LACQU] F ! WOOD5 FLOOR1 MIX$ ) DU/ &
SW1T2 AF ALL MY YE>S ( DO+ MY S;G & D.E
9 ?\S&S ( GYMNASIUMS ACR ! C.TRY1 ,I
FEEL PRETTY M* AT HOME Z ,I SIT 2H !
SCOR]'S TA# AT ! $GE (! C\RT4
  ,Z A WILD CO$ GAME PLAYS FULL-C\RT1
,LORI L1VES ! AC;N1 PLOPS 96A FOLD+
METAL *AIR1 & T[ELS (F H] FACE4 ,%E
UNBUCKLES A BLUE LEG BRACE4 8,OLD KNEE
9JURY10 %E EXPLA9S4
  ,LORI SAYS %E ?9KS %E C TALK AB 2+ A
CODEP5D5T4 ,B WAT*+ H]1 ,I WOND] IF %E
RE,Y C4 ,I J F9I%$ R1D+ A />TL+ BOOK AB
KIDS :O GR[ UP 9 ALCOHOLIC FAMILIES4 ,9
,X ,W ,N"E ,HAPP5 6,ALE6 ,DR4 ,CLAUDIA
,BLACK ID5TIFIES & EXPLA9S ?REE PRIM>Y
RULES ( CODEP5D;E3 ,DON'T TALK1 DON'T
TRU/1 DON'T FEEL4
  8,:AT D Y ?9K1 ,LORI1 AB ! WAY
CODEP5D5CY SEEMS 6BE A FAD80 ,I ASK4 8,X
SEEMS Z IF "EYBODY :O HAS ANY K9D (
P]SONAL PRO#M N[ IS BLAM+ X ON 8 OR H]
UPBR++4 ,X'S SORT ( L SAY+1 ,8,I'M N
RESPONSI# = MYF--,I'M CODEP5D5T40' ,:AT
D Y ?9K8 ,AM ,I 2+ TOO CYNICAL80
  8,YUP10 %E SAYS DECISIVELY4
  ,E>LI]1 ,I %>$ ) ,LORI MY [N FAMILY'S
HI/ORY ( SUB/.E ABUSE4 ,N[ %E SAYS1
8,MAYBE Y'RE OV]LOOK+ "S?+ 9 YR [N LIFE1
,J]RY40 ,%E TOSSES ! SW1T-DR5*$ T[EL
ASIDE & PULLS A BATT]$ BOOKBAG ONTO !
SCOREKEEP]'S TA#4 8,SIMPLE YES OR NO
ANSW]S1 PL1SE40
  ,!N %E QUIZZES ME4 ,AM ,I A FULL-BL[N
CODEP5D5T 2C ( MY BACKGR.D8 ,"H'S ! QUIZ
,LORI RATTLES (F4 ,IF Y'VE LIV$ ) "S"O
^: -PULSIVE 2HAVIOR HAS A6ECT$ Y1 G AH1D
--TE/ YRF6

    ,CODEP5D5CY ,SELF-,EVALU,N4 ,"P ,I
  ,D ,I (T5 FEEL ALI5AT$ F P1 ESPECI,Y
AU?OR;Y FIGURES8
  ,D ,I H L[ SELF-E/EEM8
  ,D ,I JUDGE MYF SEV]ELY8
  ,IS X RE,Y DI6ICULT 6EVALUATE MY [N
FAULTS8
  IS X EASI] 6BE 3C]N$ ) MEET+ O!RS'
NE$S ?AN ) MY [N RESPONSIBILITIES8
  ,AM ,I OV]LY 3C]N$ AB GA9+ APPROVAL1
EV5 IF X M1NS LOS+ MY [N ID5T;Y8
  ,D ,I FEEL GUILTY :5 ,I /& UP = MYF
9/1D ( GIV+ 9 6O!RS8
  ,D ,I FE> CRITICISM8
  ,AM ,I OV]LY AFRAID ( EXPRES.NS (
ANG]1 ( ANGRY P8
  ,D ,I (T5 FEEL ,I'M A VICTIM 9 P]SONAL
REL,N%IPS & ON ! JOB8
  ,D ,I 3FUSE LOVE ) P;Y & T5D 6LOVE P
,I C P;Y & RESCUE--P ,I ?9K ,I C 8FIX08
  ,D ,I (T5 SEEM 6BE AB&ON$ 9 REL,N%IPS8
  ,IS X DI6ICULT = ME 6EXPRESS :AT ,I'M
FEEL+--OR EV5 6"K1 MYF1 :AT ,I'M FEEL+1
9CLUD+ FEEL+S ( JOY & HAPPI;S8
  ,D ,I FEEL A4ICT$ 6EXCITE;T8
      7,*ECKLI/ ADAPT$ F ,MELODY
    ,B1TTIE1 ,CODEP5D5T ,NO ,M1 PAGE
    #AHH47
  ,N[1 ANY HUMAN CD ANSW] 8YES0 6ANY "O
( ^! "QS AT "S PO9T 9 8 OR H] LIFE4 ,WE
ALL "K :AT EA* "*I/IC FEELS L4 ,B !
CODEP5D5CY--SC>R$ * ( AN ALCOHOLIC IS
TRAPP$ 9 ^! FEEL+S1 & IS *RONIC,Y A6ECT$
0!M4
  ,X'S N EASY =! MILLIONS ( ^! KIDS :O
LIVE ) SUB/.E-ABUS+ A4ICTS L ALCOHOLICS4
,I "K ''' H[ WELL ,I "K4
  ,9CID5T,Y1 ,LORI CDN'T TALK AB H] [N
CODEP5D5CY4
  ,%E J CDN'T SEEM 6GET >.D 6TELL :AT H]
EXP]I;E 0 L1 AL? %E FELT V FREE 6TALK AB
CODEP5D5T PRO#MS 9 G5]AL1 & M9E 9
"PICUL>4

    ,LOOK+ ,BACK
  ,"O (! R1SONS1 ,I SUPPOSE1 T KIDS W
GIVE ME ! "T ( "D & LI/5 :5 ,I SP1K ON
HI<-S*OOL CAMPUSES IS T ,I'VE BE5 ": !Y
>E4 ,"SH[1 \ "! 9 ! MOB ( TWO HUNDR$ AT
,SPR+DALE ,HI< OR 9 ! TW5TY-TWO ?\S& AT
,REUNION ,>5A 9 ,DALLAS IS A KID :O
"U/&S T ,I "K :AT X ALL FEELS L4 ,MY
HE>T GOES \ 6T POOR KID4
  ,I DON'T EXACTLY H A 8/RAI<T0 PA/4 ,!
,JOHN/ON FAMILY 0 VICTIMIZ$ 0A4IC;NS4 ,&
ALM E "O (! FRS ,I HUNG >.D ) 9 ^? "DS
_H A MOM OR DAD1 BRO!R OR SI/] :O 0 AN
ALCOHOLIC OR DRU7IE4 ,A TELEVI.N
ANN\NC]'S SON 9 ,KANSAS ,C;Y TURN$ ME ON
6DRUGS4 ,BO? ( 8 P>5TS 7 ALCOHOLICS & 8
BRO!R 0 A DRUG A4ICT4 ,Y WD H N"E "KN X1
?\<1 PASS+ 0_! PRETTY HOME 9 "O (
,KANSAS ,C;Y'S NICE1 SUBURBAN >1S4
,WEEKLY HE & ,I & O!R FRS1 FLIRT$ ) D1?
9 ! "N ( FUN4
  ,I 0 P]FECTLY WILL+ 6SAY 8YES0 6SMOK+
POT1 DO+ D[N]S1 & LAT]1 62COM+ DEP5D5T
ON ,VALIUM4 ,AT "O PO9T :5 ,I 0 F\RTE51
,I R1LIZ$ T ,I SIMPLY CD NO L;G] FUNC;N4
,I _H GOTT5 ILL ) :AT \R FAMILY DOCTOR
_H DIAGNOS$ Z BLE$+ ULC]S4 ,I 0
HOSPITALIZ$ TWICE--! SECOND "T O3URR$ AF
,I _H ?R1T5$ SUICIDE4
  ,I / REMEMB] 2+ 9 ! ROOM NEXT 6MY
P>5TS' B$ROOM1 SCR1M+1 FR1K+ \1 & L\DLY
?R1T5+ SUICIDE4 ,I REMEMB]1 TOO1 T X
WASN'T MY MOM SITT+ ON ! $GE ( MY B$ T
"D1 X 0 MY DAD4 ,I REMEMB] ! /RA9 9 8
FACE1 8 ANGUI%$ VOICE SAY+1 8,HOLD ON4
''' ,WE'LL D "S?+4 ,"EY?+ IS GO+ 6BE ALL
"R40 ,DAD 0 DESP]ATE4 ,B ": 0 ,MOM T "D8
,I DON'T EV5 REMEMB] IF %E 0 9 ! C> )
,DAD & ME :5 WE MADE ! MAD DA% 6!
EM]G5CY ROOM4 ,MY F/ CRY = HELP T "D _H
BE5 A PH"O CALL 6,DAD AT 8 (FICE--A CALL
: BOOM]ANG$ HM HOME 6! $GE ( MY B$4 ,:Y
DIDN'T ,I CALL MY MOM8 ,Z AN 9T]IOR
DECORATOR AT A LOCAL DE"P;T /ORE1 %E "W$
CLOS] 6\R HOME ?AN MY DAD DID4
  ,B ,I CALL$ ,DAD 9/1D4 ,Q H"O/LY1 ,I
RES5T$ ! ROLE ALCOHOL PLAY$ 9 ,MOM'S
LIFE4 ,ALCOHOL CAME F/--X ALW -ES F/ 9 E
ALCOHOLIC'S LIFE4
  ,\R FAMILY AT ! "T 0 AT A CRITICAL
/AGE4 ,AF MY F/ HOSPITALIZ,N = BLE$+
ULC]S1 ,I _HN'T WANT$ 6G BACK 6S*OOL4
  ,S ,I DIDN'T--M* 6MY P>5TS' 3/]N,N4 ,=
WEEKS1 ,I _H VEGETAT$ AT HOME1 AL"O4
,DAD & ,MOM GOT UP E>LY & LEFT = _!
JOBS1 & MY BRO!R W5T 6S*OOL4
  ,= "DS & WEEKS ,I /AY$ AT ! H\SE--UNA#
6FUNC;N1 L A H]MIT 9 A CAVE4 ,? RETR1T F
LIFE 3T9U$ UNTIL T "D %ORTLY 2F ,EA/] :5
,I EXPLOD$ 96SUICIDAL ?R1TS1 CALL+ ,DAD
AT 8 (FICE4 ,:5 ,I 0 F9,Y REL1S$ F !
HOSPITAL AF T EPISODE1 MY SIXTY-EI<T-P.D
FRAME SCR1M$ T "S?+ 0 V WR;G2 & X WASN'T
SIMPLY T 9 ! HOSPITAL ,I _H BE5 ON A
LIQUID DIET4
  ,I "SH[ KNEW T ! 8"PY0 0 OV] ) MY FRS4
,& ,I KNEW ,I CDN'T COPE4

    ,FAMILY ,SECRETS
  ,I DEEPLY RES5T$ ,MOM'S DR9K+4 ,I HAT$
! SECRECY4 ,& ,I 4LIK$ ! FACT T ,I CD
N"E H "O ( MY FRS OV] 6SP5D ! NI<T4 ,:Y8
,2C ,MOM GOT BOMB$ E NI<T1 & ,DAD DIDN'T
WANT ANY 8\TSID]S0 >.D4 ,! SECRECY GALL$
ME4
  ,I NE$$ 6TALK ) "S"O AB \R FRACTUR$
FAMILY2 B ,I 0 -MITT$ 6! DEP5D5T'S F/
M&ATE3 8,DON'T TELL40 ,I /R;GLY 2LIEVE
N[ T :5 ANY TE5 HAS A P>5T VICTIMIZ$
0DRUG OR ALCOHOL ABUSE1 T KID NE$S
6C\NSEL ) "S C>+ 9DIVIDUAL4 ,B ,I _H NO
"O4 ,MR4 ,ALCOHOL 0 ! ONLY "O ALL[$
6SP5D ! NI<T4 ,& HE SP5T E NI<T 9 \R
HOME--& TURN$ X 96HELL4
  ,X'S H>D 6"E =GET :AT X 0 L 2+ S CLOSE
6"S"O :O 0 TRANS=M$ DRAMATIC,Y EA* & E
NI<T "? A DEMONIC CL\D ( DR9K+4
  ,Z A TE5AG]1 ,I MISS$ ! MOM ,I N"E
RE,Y GOT 6"K2 ,I M\RN$ =! 3V]S,NS WE N"E
_H4 ,9 ! HALLS ( MY MEMORY1 "! >E C]TA9
>TIFACTS T REM9D ME (! HELL ( X ALL4 ,=
EXAMPLE1 "! >E ! ICE TRAYS4
  ,MOM 3/ANTLY KEPT ! ICE TRAYS FULL 9 !
FREEZ]4 ,T 0 IMPORTANT2 WE ALW _H 6H ICE
AVAILA#4 ,X SEEM$ Z IF "S QUIET
POLT]GEI/ WD :ISP] 6EA* ( U BOYS N
6NOTICE Z ,MOM MADE H] RECURR5T TRIPS 6!
ICE TRAYS EA* EV5+4 ,B WE DID NOTICE4
,WE HE>D H] FREQU5T TREKS 6! FREEZ]1 !
ICE CUBES DROPP+ NOISILY 96L>GE PLA/IC
CUPS4 ,WE ALL HE>D ! NOISE--& WE KNEW
:AT X M1NT4
  ,ANO!R >TIFACT F ! HELL ( MY TE5AGE
YE>S IS ! MEMORY (! CUPBO>D ABV !
PANTRY4
  ,T 0 ! HOME (! BOTTLE4 ,AF ,MOM GOT H]
GLASS IC$ UP1 "! 0 A PIT /OP AT T
CUPBO>D4 ,!N1 ) H] PLA/IC CUP FILL$1 %E
WD ALW TAKE ! %ORTCUT \ (! KIT*51 "? !
D9+ ROOM & LIV+ ROOM & QKLY UP ! /AIRS
6! VAULT ( H] PRIVATE B$ROOM4 ,0TAK+ T
R\TE1 %E WDN'T H 65C.T] U 9 ! FAMILY
ROOM4 ,B WE ALL KNEW PRECISELY :AT 0 GO+
ON4 ,:AT AMAZ$ ME 0 ! FACT T ,MOM
APP>5TLY ?"\ WE DIDN'T "K %E _H A DR9K+
PRO#M4 ,"SH[1 %E ?"\ WE 7 OBLIVI\S 6!
:OLE MATT]4 ,B H[ CD WE H BE58
  ,R>ELY DID ,MOM "E SIT & WAT* ,,TV )
U1 OR TALK ) U--OR J 2 ) U4 ,NO1 WE 7
PUT ON ! BACK BURN]4 ,ALCOHOL 0 M
IMPORTANT4
  ,I RES5T$ ,MOM'S ABS;E4 ,AL? %E 0 AT
HOME1 %E 0 ALM ALW UP 9 H] B$ROOM ) T
:ITE DOOR %UT4 ,& T PLACE N"E *ANG$4 ,I
C SEE X CLE>LY N[ 9 MY MEMORY1 Z ,I
RECALL ! FEW "TS ! DOOR WD OP51 & ,I WD
/1L A GL.E 96MY MOM'S _W4 ,"! %E SAT1
ALW ON ! LEFT SIDE (! B$ NEXT 6! ,,TV1 !
CURTA9S ALW DRAWN1 A C]TA9 WI/;L LOOK ON
H] FACE4
  ,MY MOM M/ H BE5 M "KL$GEA# ?AN ,,TV
,GUIDE OR ! ,A4 ,C4 ,NIELS5 ,-PANY AB
:AT TELEVI.N S]IES1 MOVIE1 OR SPECIAL 0
6AIR & :54 ,%E 0 ALW 9 H] ROOM1 WAT*+
TELEVI.N--)DRAWN F ME4
  ,P]H T IS :Y ,I DID N TURN 6H] LAT]1
:5 ,I 2GAN 6"Q ! EXI/;E ( LIFE & MY [N
S5SE ( P]SONAL WOR?.S;S4
  ,= ALL ! SUBT]FUGE & ORNA;TAL COV]UP1
,I KNEW A FACT T CD N 2 PREEMPT$4 ,MY
MOM 0 AN ALCOHOLIC4 ,A"P F A MIRACLE1 ,I
KNEW "! WD N"E 2 ANY *ANGE4 ,T 0 ! K9D (
DESPAIR ,I GREW UP )--! DESPAIR (!
CODEP5D5T4

    ,CODEP5D5CY & ,2+ ! ,* ( AN
    ,ALCOHOLIC
  ,:AT IS CODEP5D5CY8 ,ROB]T ,SU2Y
WRITES 9 ! BOOK ,CO,DEP5D5CY3 ,AN ,EM]G+
,ISSUE T CODEP5D5CY IS 8AN EMO;NAL1
PSY*OLOGICAL & 2HAVIORAL 3DI;N T
DEVELOPS Z A RESULT ( AN 9DIVIDUAL'S
PROL;G$ EXPOSURE 6& PRACTICE (A SET (
RULES--RULES : PREV5T ! OP5 EXPRES.N (
FEEL+ Z WELL Z ! DIRECT 4CUS.N ( P]SONAL
& 9T]P]SONAL PRO#MS0 7PAGE #BF74
  ,CODEP5D5TS >E P ^: LIVES H 2COME
UNMANAGEA# Z A RESULT ( LIV+ 9 A -MITT$
REL,N%IP ) AN ALCOHOLIC4
  ,! DEF9I;N1 ( C\RSE1 BROAD5S EASILY
6DESCRIBE ^? :O LIVE ) ANY *EMIC,Y
DEP5D5T P]SON OR ANY P]SON )A -PULSIVE
4ORD]--F EAT+ 4ORD]S 6GAMBL+ & C]TA9
SEXUAL 2HAVIORS4 ,AL? ! 3DI;N IS
9CR$IBLY -PLEX1 ANO!R HELP;L "O-S5T;E
DEF9I;N MI<T 2 ! "O ,MELODY ,B1TTIE
GIVES 9 H] BOOK1 ,CODEP5D5T ,NO ,M3 ,A
CODEP5D5T IS ANY"O :O HAS ALL[$ ANO!R
P]SON'S 2HAVIOR 6A6ECT HM OR H]1 & :O IS
OBSESS$ ) 3TROLL+ T P]SON'S 2HAVIOR4
7PAGE #CJ7 ,CODEP5D5TS WANT 6FIX P1
6MAKE ?+S OKAY1 EV5 AT ! CO/ ( SELF-
SACRIFICE4 ,X IS TRUE1 :AT ,CLAUDIA
,BLACK SAYS 9 ,X ,W ,N"E ,HAPP5 6,ME6
,CODEP5D5CY T1*ES *N ?3 ,DON'T FEEL4
,DON'T TRU/4 ,DON'T TALK4
  ,H[ DOES A * 2G9 6REACT 6LIFE Z A
CODEP5D5T8 ,HE OR %E 2G9S 0EXP]I5C+
REP1T$ 9CID5TS S* Z ,HEL5 ,KNODE'S3 ,I
?9K X M/ H BE5 S"EAL "DS 2F ,HALL[E5
#AIFD--MY MEMORY ( MY *ILDHOOD IS PRETTY
BAD4 ,MY SI/]S1 MY "M1 & ,I 7 SPR1D "? !
FRONT "P (! H\SE CUTT+ \ ORANGE C>DBO>D
PUMPK9S & BLACK C>DBO>D WIT*ES 6TAPE 6!
FRONT W9D[S4 ,WE LIV$ 9 A SMALL PLACE ":
MESSES DEVELOP$ EASILY4 ,X 0 PIT* D>K
\TSIDE--,CANADIAN W9T]S />T E>LY--& ,I
?9K X 0 2F D9N]"T1 2C ,"F WASN'T HOME F
! (FICE YET4
  ,:5 HE F9,Y DID -E HOME--AT ? PO9T
EV5TS GET FUZZY--HE M/ H WALK$ 9 ! FRONT
DOOR & NOTIC$ ! MESS4 ,B HE N"E WD H SD
ANY?+ "R AWAY1 J SMIL$ & G"O T5SE4
  ,AF A :ILE1 "S?+ M9OR PROBABLY TRI7]$
HM1 "S?+ UNRELAT$ 6! SCATT]$ PILES (
EVISC]AT$ C>DBO>D SQU>ES &! FACT T
NOBODY W>N$ HM WE'D 2 HAV+ FUN :5 HE GOT
HOME4
  ,I REMEMB] 2+ PICK$ UP & HURL$ ACR !
LIV+ ROOM AG/ A WALL1 OR ONTO A C\*4 ,MY
GLASSES WD H FL[N (F1 S ,I PROBABLY
CDN'T SEE ANY?+ CLE>LY AF T4 ,I C'T
REMEMB] ": "EY"O ELSE RAN 6OR H[ L;G ?
SC5E LA/$2 ,I DON'T REMEMB] ANY S.DS--J
A SICK1 HOT FEEL+ 9 MY H1D &! PIT ( MY
/OMA*4 ,I REMEMB] HE RIPP$ "S SLID+
CLOSET DOORS (F _! TRACKS4
  ,MY "M GOT \R COATS & PU%$ U \ (!
H\SE4 ,%E DROVE U D[N 6! %OPP+ MALL4 ,I
DON'T REMEMB] H[ L;G WE /AY$ "! OR :AT
WE DID OR IF WE "E ATE D9N]4 ,I DON'T
REMEMB] :AT HAPP5$ :5 WE GOT BACK HOME4
,I DON'T REMEMB] :AT ,I 0 ?9K+4 ,I ONLY
REMEMB] T ,I FELT SICK4
  ,HEL5'S A3.T1 PUBLI%$ 9 H] ,L4,A4
,WEEKLY >TICLE 8,SICK ,Z ,\R ,SECRETS0
7,JULY #BG1 #AIIJ1 PAGE #AF71 MAKES MY
9N] TURMOIL Z ! KID ( AN ALCOHOLIC "M
SEEM PRETTY TAME4 ,B ! SAME LESSONS 7 "!
= ,HEL5 Z !Y >E = ANY KID HAV+ 6LIVE )A
*EMIC,Y DEP5D5T P>5T4
  ,9 ! #AIHJ'S1 ! KIDS :O GREW UP Z
ALCOHOLIC CODEP5D5TS 2GAN ORGANIZ+ =
RECOV]Y4 ,!Y 2GAN 6CALL !MVS 8ADULT *N (
ALCOHOLICS40
  ,I N"E ?"\ ( LIFE ) MY "F10 ,HEL5
3T9UES 9 ! ,L4,A4 ,WEEKLY PIECE1 8Z
ANY?+ O!R ?AN NORMAL4 ,X 0 NORMAL1 ,I
?"\1 6FEEL L LIV+ 9 A FAMILY 0 !
EQUIVAL5T ( 2+ /UCK ON AN ELEVATOR )A
MON/] & YR ONLY HOPE 0 6GET \ (!
ELEVATOR ! M9UTE Y CD40
  8,SICK ,Z ,\R ,SECRETS0 /ATES T !
#AIHC PUBLIC,N ( ,JANET ,G4 ,WOITITZS
BOOK ,ADULT ,*N ( ,ALCOHOLICS 89AUGURAT$
"O (! FA/E/ GR[+ SELF-HELP RECOV]Y
MOVE;TS 9 A C.TRY N[ BUR/+ AT !
PSY*OLOGICAL S1MS ) RECOV]Y MOVE;TS4 ,X
IS E/IMAT$ T A NEW ,ADULT ,*N (
,ALCOHOLICS GR\P =MS E "D 9 ? C.TRY60
  ,KNODE REPORTS T ,WOITITZ =MULAT$ !
FOLL[+ ?IRTE5-PO9T "*IZ,N ( TYPICAL
ADULT *N ( AN ALCOHOLIC4

    ,CODEP5D5CY ,SELF-,EVALU,N4 ,"P ,,II
  ,IF Y >E AN ADULT * :O HAS LIV$ ) "S"O
) -PULSIVE 2HAVIOR S* Z *EMICAL
DEP5D5CY1 ?9K "? ! FOLL[+ LI/4
  ,KIDS :O GR[ UP 9 H>D-CORE CODEP5D5CY
2COME ADULTS :O G5],Y3 --GUESS AT :AT
NORMAL IS1--H DI6ICULTY FOLL[+ PROJECTS
"? 6! 5D1 --LIE :5 !Y CD TELL ! TRU?
--JUDGE !MVS )\T M]CY1 --H DI6ICULTY
HAV+ FUN1 --TAKE !MVS V S]I\SLY1 --H
DI6ICULTY ) 9TIMATE REL,N%IPS1
--OV]REACT 6*ANGES OV] : !Y H NO 3TROL1
--3/ANTLY SEEK APPROVAL & A6IRM,N1
--USU,Y FEEL !Y >E DI6]5T F O!R P1 >E
SUP]-RESPONSI# OR SUP] IRRESPONSI#1 >E
EXTREMELY LOYAL1 EV5 :5 ! LOYALTY IS
UNDES]V$1 & >E IMPULSIVE1 -MITT+ !MVS
6UN-?"\"? C\RSES ( AC;N1 : L1DS !M
63FU.N1 SELFLOA?+1 &A LOSS ( 3TROL OV]
_! 5VIRON;T4
  ,:AT D WE D IF TOO _M ( ^! "*I/ICS
DESCRIBE U8
  ,WE GET HELP4 ,WE'LL \TL9E "S (!
ORGANIZ,NS BATTL+ ! CURSE ( CODEP5D5CY
LAT] 9 ,"P ,II ( ? BOOK--_M ( !M >E
GR\PS T USE Z _! RECOV]Y PROCESS ! FAM\S
,TWELVE ,/EPS DEVELOP$ 0,ALCOHOLICS
,ANONYM\S4 ,B = N[1 ALL[ ME 6%>E ) Y A
HE>T-FELT BIT ( ADVICE F ,MELODY
,B1TTIE1 H]F AN ADULT * ( AN ALCOHOLIC4
,9 H] BOOK1 ,B1TTIE WRITES3 8,I DETE/ !
41SE ( ALCOHOLISM4 ,*EMICAL DEP5D5CY &
O!R -PULSIVE 4ORD]S DE/ROY P--B1UTI;L1
9TELLIG5T1 S5SITIVE1 C>+1 LOV+1 CR1TIVE
P :O D N DES]VE 6BE DE/ROY$4 ,! ILL;SES
KILL LOVE & DR1MS1 HURT *N & TE> A"P
FAMILIES4
  ,ALCOHOLISM L1VES 9 XS WAKE %E>$1
FRAG;T$1 2WILD]$ VICTIMS4 ,"S"TS ! E>LY
D1? X BR+S 6! DR9K] CAUSES F> LESS PA9
?AN ! WRET*$ ILL;S CAUS$ DUR+ 8 OR H]
LIFE"T4 ,X IS A HORRID1 CUNN+1 BA6L+1
P[];L & D1DLY 41SE4
  ,I UNABA%$LY LOVE ,TWELVE ,/EPS
PROGRAMS4 ,I H GRT RESPECT = ALL ( !M3
,ALCOHOLICS ,ANONYM\S1 = P )A DESIRE
6/OP DR9K+2 ,,AI-,ANON1 = P A6ECT$
0"S"O'S DR9K+2 ,ALATE51 = TE5AG]S A6ECT$
0"S"O'S DR9K+2 & ,N>COTICS ,ANONYM\S1 =
P A4ICT$ 6DRUGS40 7PAGE #AF7 ,%E !N LI/S
M ORGANIZ,NS--9CLUD+ ,ADULT ,*N (
,ALCOHOLICS--: >E HELP+ ?\S&S RECOV] F !
RAVAGES ( CODEP5D5CY4 ,! A4RESSES & PH"O
3TACTS = ^! GR\PS >E LI/$ 9 ! ,RES\RCES
SEC;N ( ? BOOK4 ,IF ! "QS 9CLUD$ 9 ?
*APT]'S SELF-EVALU,NS HIT A N]VE1 ,I
URGE Y 63SID] GETT+ HELP F "O ( ^!
ORGANIZ,NS1 OR F A PROFES.NAL C\NSELOR1
OR YR LOCAL M5TAL H1L? S]VICES4
  ,B P]H Y DIDN'T MULL "? ! EVALU,NS V
C>E;LLY 2C YR P>5T WASN'T OR ISN'T AN
ALCOHOLIC4 ,OR P]H HE OR %E DRANK 7OR
DR9KS N[7 B Y'RE N SURE X'S A CASE (
ALCOHOLISM4
  ,IF "! 0 OR IS DR9K+ 9 ! HOME1 B X'S N
CLE> :E!R ALCOHOL RUL$ YR FAMILY 2H !
SC5ES1 "W C>E;LLY "? ! "QS 2L4 ,!Y MI<T
PROD YR ?9K+ S9CE !Y'RE TAK5 F A ,*N (
,ALCOHOLICS ,SCRE5+ ,TE/4 7,! TE/ IS
AVAILA# F ,CAMELOT ,UNLIMIT$ 9 ,*ICAGO4
,WRITE !M AT #E ,NOR? ,WABA% ,AV5UE1
,SUITE #ADJI1 ,*ICAGO1 ,,IL #FJFJB = M
9=M,N AB _! ?IRTY-PO9T SURVEY : C HELP
9DICATE :E!R Y'RE J ! * (A DR9K]--OR ! *
( AN ALCOHOLIC67

    ,CODEP5D5CY ,SELF-,EVALU,N4 ,"P
    ,,III
  ,H Y "E ?"\ T "O ( YR P>5TS _H A DR9K+
PRO#M8
  ,H Y "E LO/ SLEEP 2C (A P>5T'S DR9K+8
  ,DID Y "E PROTECT ANO!R FAMILY MEMB] F
A P>5T :O 0 DR9K+8
  ,DID Y "E FEEL RESPONSI# =1 & GUILTY
AB1 A P>5T'S DR9K+8
  ,H Y "E )DRAWN F & AVOID$ \TSIDE
ACTIVITIES & FRS 2C ( EMB>RASS;T & %AME
OV] A P>5T'S DR9K+ PRO#M8
  ,DID Y "E /AY AWAY F HOME 6AVOID !
DR9K+ P>5T OR YR O!R P>5T'S REAC;N 6!
DR9K+8
  ,DID Y "E TAKE OV] ANY *ORES & DUTIES
AT HOME T 7 USU,Y D"O 0A P>5T 2F HE OR
%E DEVELOP$ A DR9K+ PRO#M8
  ,DID A P>5T "E MAKE PROMISES 6Y T 7 N
KEPT 2C ( DR9K+8
  ,DID Y "E WI% T Y CD TALK 6"S"O :O CD
"U/& & HELP ! ALCOHOL-RELAT$ PRO#MS 9 YR
FAMILY8
                99 99 99
  ,I KNEW ALCOHOL 0 "P ( MY "M'S LIFE2 B
Z A TE5AG]1 ,I N"E RE,Y SAW T X 0 "P (
MY LIFE TOO4 ,I N[ SEE _M CODEP5D5T
TRAITS 9 MY [N LIFE1 & YET ,I DON'T FEEL
OV]:ELM$ 0!M4 ,I ?9K M* ( MY FREEDOM F
BONDAGE 6CODEP5D5CY HAS -E "? MY FAI? 9
,GOD'S PROMISE T WE C 2 TRANS=M$2 EV5
EMO;NAL SC>S &! UGLI;S (! PA/ C 2 H1L$4
,B J 6SEE ": ,I D /& Z AN ADULT :O W1!R$
AN A4IC;N-PLAGU$ H\SEHOLD DUR+ MY TE5
YE>S1 ,I MET ) "O ( ^? R>E/ ( CR1TURES--
A W>M1 HAPPY PSY*IATRI/6

    ,! ,JOE ,K+ ,3NEC;N
  ,:51 Z AN ASSOCI,N GE>$ 6HELP+ TE5AG]S
9 TR\#1 WE E/ABLI%$ \R N,NWIDE TOLL-FREE
HOTL9E #A-HJJ-,,SVATE5 7#HJJGHB-HCCF7 9
! FALL ( #AIHG1 WE SOON LE>N$ T \R (FICE
CD N H&LE ALL ! CALLS F KIDS 9 CRISIS1 F
KIDS ACTU,Y FLIRT+ ) D1?4 ,,AT&,T 9=M$ U
T WE RCVD #C1DBA CALLS F DESP]ATE TE5S 9
! F/ SIX MON?S AL"O6
  ,I 0 9CR1S+LY 3V9C$ WE NE$$ TRA9$
!RAPI/S ) SPECIAL EXP]TISE 9 C\NSEL+
6ANSW] ! CALLS 9/1D ( VOLUNTE]S4 ,:ILE
SP1K+ 9 ,TULSA1 ,OKLAHOMA1 PUBLIC S*OOLS
,I MET ,J]RY ,DILLON1 ,,CEO & F.D] (
,C5TURY ,H1L?,C>E ,CORPOR,N4 ,DAILY A
?\S& KIDS 9 CRISIS RCVD VALUA# C\NSEL+ &
!RAPY F "O ( ,C5TURY'S FIFTY-TWO
PROGRAMS 9 SEV5TE5 DI6]5T CITIES 9 !
,UNIT$ ,/ATES4 ,) OV] A ?\S& FULL-"T
/AFF MEMB]S1 ,C5TURY ,H1L?,C>E IS !
N,N'S L>GE/ ADOLESC5T-H1L?-C>E PROVID]4
,9/1D ( *>G+ ! HI<E/ RATES1 ,C5TURY'S
PHILOSOPHY HAS BE5 6(F] ! BE/ POSSI# =M
( !RAPY AT ! L1/ EXP5SE 6! "Y P]SON 9
NE$4
  ,I OBS]V$ ,C5TURY'S PROGRAM1 DECID$
6L9K UP ) X1 & TGR R1* \ 6MILLIONS (
KIDS NE$+ HELP4
  ,"P ( \R REW>D+ REL,N%IP HAS BE5 HAV+
,C5TURY'S TRA9$ PROFES.NALS ANSW] !
PH"OS ( \R HOTL9E4 ,ANO!R P]K HAS BE5
MEET+ ,JOE ,W4 ,K+1 ,M4,D41 ,C5TURY'S
VICE PRESID5T ( M$ICAL A6AIRS4 ,TRAVEL+
) HM F ,DES ,MO9ES 6,VIRG9IA ,B1*1 ,I
S5S$ 9 ,DR4 ,K+ A UNIQUE BL5D ( IMPE3A#
PSY*IATRIC CR$5TIALS &A _SUAL -MIT;T11 A
HI<] PURPOSE1 ,I KNEW ,JOE WD 2 AN
EXCELL5T RES\RCE SPECIALI/ = ,X'S ,KILL+
,\R ,KIDS4
  ,Z ! BOOK DEVELOP$1 ,DR4 ,K+1 !
PSY*IATRI/1 2CAME ,JOE1 ! FR & C\NSELOR4
  ,6HELP ME GET 6! BOTTOM ( MY [N
9VOLVE;T 9 "S (! "*I/ICS ( CODEP5D5CY1
,JOE ONCE 9T]VIEW$ ME3 8,:Y DON'T Y />T
\ 0TELL+ ME :AT YR E>LIE/ MEMORY IS AB
YR LIFE SITU,N80 HE 2GAN4 8,:5 DID Y F/
R1LIZE T "! 0 "S?+ AMISS ) YR MOM80
  ,I ALR FELT UNCOM=TA#1 J HAV+ 6?9K
BACK "? ! YE>S4 8,? ALCOHOL ?+ 2GAN
GRADU,Y UNTIL T[>D ! 5D1 %E 0 DR9K+
NE>LY A QU>T ( VODKA A "D4 ,I REMEMB] T
:5 WE LIV$ 9 ,OKLAHOMA ,C;Y1 MY MOM US$
6PLAY A LOT ( BRIDGE ) LADIES 9 !
NEI<BORHOOD & T !Y DRANK BE]4 ,& ,I
REMEMB] A FEW FI<TS T MY P>5TS SEEM$ 6H
T 7 M ?AN ! AV]AGE >GU;T--!Y 7 SCR1M+4
,^? 7 AB SECOND-GRADE MEMORIES40
  ,I ?"\ BACK3 8,:5 MY MOM GOT LOAD$ %E
RE,Y GOT M1N1 & S A LOT (! 3NEC;N ,I H )
H] 2+ AN ALCOHOLIC 0 EI ACT+ M1N 6,DAD
OR SU45LY HAV+ A TOT,Y DI6]5T ATTITUDE1
A DI6]5T P]SONAL;Y T[>D U4 ,X 0 A
DRAMATIC DI6];E4
  8,:5 %E 0 SOB]1 %E 0 HE NICE/ P]SON 9
! 5TIRE _W4
  ,%E'D GIVE Y ANY?+4 ,E N[ & !N %E MADE
BR[NIES = U OR "S TYPE ( DESS]T :5 WE
CAME HOME F S*OOL-WE 7 ! 5VY ( \R FRS4
,= ,*RI/MAS1 %E'D MAKE \R /OCK+S4 ,I
M1N1 ,*RI/MAS & E HOLI"D 7 MAJOR
PRODUC;NS4 ,AT ,*RI/MAS1 \R H\SE 0 LOAD$
) TOYS ( E K9D4
  ,\R BASE;T 0 A P5NY >CADE4 ,B !N :5 %E
GOT DRUNK1 %E 0 Z M1N Z Y CD GET40
  ,I 0 SURPRIS$ AT H[ QKLY ,I REMEMB]$ S
_M DETAILS F S L;G AGO4
  ,JOE ASK$1 8,& :AT WD %E D :5 %E 0
DRUNK80
  8,WELL10 ,I SD1 8,I REMEMB] H] ?R1T5+
,DAD1 ?R1T5+ 6L1VE HM1 HOLL]+ F 2H CLOS$
DOORS4 ,%E WD GET 9EBRIAT$ 6! PO9T T !
L1/ LL ?+ WD SET H] (F4 ,I REMEMB] "O "T
%E J ?REW C(FEE GR.DS >.D ! KIT*5
--SPLATT]$ "EY":4 ,MY DAD ALW CL1N$ UP !
MESS4 ,& ,I GUESS ,I _H A GR[+ RES5T;T
T[>D MY MOM4
  ,: IS S DI6]5T 9 \R REL,N%IP N[ S9CE
%E'S BE5 SOB]4
  ,WE >E BE/ ( FRS2 B WE 7 N"E T WAY
2F40
  ,JOE ASK$1 8,DID Y TALK AB X ) YR
BRO!RS8 ,0 "! ANY TYPE ( CAM>AD]IE 2T Y
FIVE BOYS8 ,DID Y FEEL F"R5$ ( H] OR- 80
8,I 0 F"R5$10 ,I SD QKLY4 8,I REMEMB]
FEEL+ F"R5$ AT NI<T4 ,I M1N1 X 0 A SC>Y
?+ :5 %E RE,Y GOT TANK$ UP & GOT 96"O (
^? FITS ( ABSOLUTE ANG]1 SCR1M+40
  8,SC>$ = H]1 OR SC>$ = YRF--OR BO?80
,JOE ASK$4
  8,I WASN'T RE,Y SC>$ = H]4 ,I FELT L
%E KNEW :AT %E 0 DO+1 ,I 0 SC>$ M = ME4
,X 0 K9D (A ROLL] COA/]1 EMO;N,Y40
  ,JOE ASK$1 8,W]E YR BRO!RS ANY SUPPORT
6Y8 ,7 Y A SUPPORT 6EA* O!R80
  8,N RE,Y10 ,I SD1 REMEMB]+4 8,X 0 K9D
( ,8,%UT UP2 DON'T TALK AB X40' ,UP
UNTIL ,MOM GOT 96! MIDNI<T H\R (
ALCOHOLISM1 WE Z A FAMILY N"E 4CUSS$ H]
PRO#M4 ,X 0 J A -PLETE UNM5;NA#40
  ,JOE SD1 8,I'M TRY+ 6GET A FEEL+ AB H[
Y COP$ )! PRO#M4 ,X S.DS Z IF Y DID X N
9 3C]T ) B P>ALLEL 6H["E YR BRO!RS
COP$40
  8,I ?9K S10 ,I SD4 ,I ?9K ALL ( \R
COP+ ME*ANISMS 7 DI6]5T4 ,MY REAC;N
SEEM$ AT F/ 6BE RES5T;T T WE CD N"E H A
FR OV]2 NO "O CD "E SP5D ! NI<T4
,ANYBODY 2SS U FIVE SONS & ,MOM & ,DAD 7
CALL$ ,8\TSID]S40' ,( C\RSE1 \TSID]S
CDN'T "K AB X4 ,& ,I FELT Z IF ,I 7
LOCK$ 9 A PRISON 9 A WAY40
  8,W]E Y ISOLAT$ F YR FRS80 ,JOE ASK$4
  8,Y1H1 ISOLAT$ Z F> Z :AT ,I ?"\ 0
NORMAL = O!R KIDS--6H FRS OV]1 9VITE P
6D9N]1 Y "K40 ,I REMEMB] ! FEEL+S N[1 J
TALK+ AB X4
  8,W]E Y L"OLY80
  8,I ?9K 6A DEGREE4 ,I'D EV5 H A H>D "T
HAV+ FRS \TSIDE (! H\SE4 ,MY BE/ FR'S
MOM & DAD 7 BO? ALCOHOLICS1 & HE 0 TOT,Y
MESS$ UP ON DRUGS4 ,I GUESS WE BO? HUNG
>.D TGR 2C WE 7 9 SIMIL> CIRCUM/.ES4 ,B
,I M/ H BE5 L"OLY 2C 9 JUNIOR HI< ,I
CAME 6! PO9T ": ,I 0 R1DY 6KILL MYF10 ,I
SD4
  8,D Y REMEMB] :AT L$ 6T K9D (
HOPE.S;S80
  8,I 0 DO+ DRUGS &! :OLE R\T9E1 & !N ,I
DEVELOP$ A SEV]E DIGES;N PRO#M DIAGNOS$
Z BLE$+ ULC]S10 ,I SD4 8,I QUIT GO+
6S*OOL4 ,I M1N ,I TOT,Y *ECK$ \ ( NORMAL
LIFE 9 ! EI<? GRADE4 ,MY MOM & DAD BO?
"W$1 S AB #H3CJ E MORN+ "EYBODY 0 G"O--
MY BRO!RS 7 9 S*OOL1 MY MOM & DAD 7 G"O4
,& ,I SAT HOME ALL "D AL"O & FELT J A
TOTAL HOPE.S;S4 ,I CDN'T TALK4 ,I GUESS
"P ( MY PRO#M 0 ,I CDN'T RE,Y TALK 6MY
MOM 2C ,I KNEW %E _H H] [N PRO#M4 ,& MY
DAD HAS ALW BE5 ! K9D ( GUY :O C'T H&LE
R1L H1VY TRAUMA1 Y "K4 ,I WASN'T A# RE,Y
62G9 -MUNICAT+ ) HM UNTIL AF ,I 2CAME A
,*RI/IAN & AF HE DID4 ,I ?9K A
SIGNIFICANT 3TRIBUT+ PRO#M 0 T N"O ( MY
FAMILY 7 ,*RI/IANS4 ,WE 7 TOT,Y \ 9 LEFT
FIELD _SU,Y40
  8,:AT D Y REMEMB] EXP]I5C+ EMO;N,Y :5
Y 7 HOME AL"O & "EYBODY 0 G"O80 ,JOE
ASK$4
  ,I SD1 8,I REMEMB] V CLE>LY WAT*+ !
CLOCK ON ! MANTLE 9 ! FAMILY ROOM AF
"EY"O _H LEFT AB A QU>T] ( N9E4 ,I GOT S
DESP]ATE ,I'D LOOK 9 ! BACK ( MY MOM'S
,GD ,H\SEKEEP+-TYPE MAGAZ9ES = ^? LL ADS
= "S RELIGI\S GR\P ": Y CD S5D AWAY =A
CROSS OR RELIGI\S P>APH]NALIA4 ,& OV] !
WEEKS1 ,I ACTU,Y DID S5D AWAY = "S ( T
/UFF40
  ,! MEMORIES 7 -+ EASILY N[4 8,I
REMEMB] ,I W5T UP 6MY DAD'S CLOSET & ,I
GOT 8 BIG1 LI<T-BLUE BA?ROBE \ ( 8
CLOSET & ,I WORE X E "D ,I 0 AT HOME4 ,X
DIDN'T EV5 2G9 6FIT ME1 B ,I ?9K X 0 MY
FEE# ATTEMPT 6TRY & GET MY P>5TS' ATT5;N
& SAY1 ,8,TALK 6ME4 ,HELP ME40' ,!
BA?ROBE _H DEEP POCKETS ON BO? SIDES &
,I C>RI$ ! PA9 PILLS & SLEEP+ PILLS ,I'D
BE5 GIV5 AT ! HOSPITAL "EY": ,I W5T4 ,I
?"\ LIFE WASN'T WOR? LIV+4 ,& H&L+ ^?
CAPSULES & PILLS 9 MY POCKETS E "D1 ,I
R1SON$ T ,I CD PROBABLY TAKE !M 9 !
MORN+ AF "EY"O _H LEFT1 & 0! "T ANYBODY
GOT HOME AB F\R OR FIVE1 ,I'D 2 D1D4
  8,MAYBE T'S :Y X'S EASY = ME TD
6ID5TIFY ) P :O GET DEPRESS$ & C'T
EXPLA9 X--2C ,I "K :AT T FEELS L40
  ,JOE ASK$1 8,:AT DID X FEEL L80
  ,I SD1 8,I ?9K ,I GOT 6! PO9T T ,I J
DIDN'T WANT 6G ON ANYMORE--T 0 "P (!
DEPRES.N4 ,I M1N HOPE.S;S4 ,I FELT
NAUS1T$ A LOT4 ,N[1 Z A ,*RI/IAN1 ,I'D
SAY ,GOD ALL[$ ALL T 6HAPP5 6DRAG ME
6,HMF4 ,B ,I J REMEMB] FEEL+ RE,Y V
CLOSE 6! $GE1 & MY P>5TS DIDN'T EV5 SEEM
6"U/& X1 NO "O DID40
  ,I GOT LO/ 9 ! S5SE ( AL"O;S ( ^? "DS4
8,I DON'T "E REMEMB] TURN+ 6MY MOM :5 ,I
0 9 ? HOPE.S 3DI;N4 ,T'S :AT ,I 0 GETT+
AT4 ,& ^! LA/ TWELVE YE>S Z MY "W )
TE5AG]S HAS GR[N & Z ,I'VE BE5 PLAC$ AT
DI6]5T "TS "U 9ORD9ATE PRESSURE1 ,I'VE
ALW CALL$ HOME 6TALK 6MY DAD4 ,X'S ONLY
9 ! LA/ TWO &A HALF YE>S T "!'S BE5 A
REV]SAL ( T4 ,N[ ,I TALK 6,MOM AB "S (!
/RU7LES ,I G "?40
  ,DUR+ \R 9T]VIEW1 ,I F.D T ,I WANT$
6TALK M & M AB :AT ALCOHOL DID 6\R
FAMILY4 ,I WANT$ 6EXPLA9 X ALL 6,JOE1 ?
FR :O J HAPP5S 6BE A PSY*IATRI/4 ,B ,I
CAU<T MYF E ONCE 9 A :ILE WORRY+1 ,I
WOND] :AT HE'S ?9K+8
  ,S* ?"\S M/ H BE5 VE/IGES (! OLD
8DON'T TELL0 RULE4
  ,B ,I BUM#D ON3 8,IN A S5SE1 WE 7 !
,AM]ICAN-DR1M-TYPE FAMILY4 ,WE _H ALL !
COSMETIC ORNA;TS (A FAMILY T SEEM+LY 0
HAPPY--) BIG CELEBR,NS AT HOLI"DS1 A
NICE H\SE1 LOTS ( ?+S4 ,B MY MOM'S
ALCOHOL PRO#M J 3T9U$ 6GET WORSE & WORSE
& WORSE1 & X 0 J "S?+ WE DIDN'T TALK AB4
  ,IF WE BR"\ X UP1 WE 7 SEV]ELY
REPRIM&$40
  8,S10 SD ,JOE1 8X 0 K9D ( L ! ELEPHANT
9 ! LIV+ ROOM8 ,J IGNORE X80
  8,"R4
  8,&! E6ECTS ( ALL ? N[80
  ,I FELT /UMP$ =A M9UTE4 ,!N ,I SD1
8,PROBABLY ! BI7E/ -P5S,N IS DET]M9,N--A
DRIVE 6HELP O!RS4 ,I M1N ,I CD KEEP A
:OLE /AFF BUSY ALL ! "T--PROBABLY TOO
BUSY--"W+ ) TE5AG]S' PRO#MS4 ,I'M ALW
"W+ ON A PROJECT4
  ,X'S V DI6ICULT = ME 6SIT D[N4 ,I AM !
K9D ( P]SON :O DOES TWO OR ?REE ?+S AT
ONCE4 ,IF ,I'M GO+ 6WAT* ,,TV1 ,I'M GO+
6R1D A NEWSPAP] OR /UDY :ILE ,I'M WAT*+
,,TV4 ,I ?9K A LOT ( MY DRIVE N[1 ,JOE1
IS 2+ S MIS.N-ORI5T$4 ,I FEEL Z IF ,I H
A CALL+ :5 ,I SEE S* TREM5D\S NE$40
  ,JOE SD1 8,I'M J 3C]N$ AB YR BURN+ YRF
\40
  8,TWO YE>S AGO ,I 0 M* WORSE ?AN ,I AM
N[4 ,"S"TS ,I WDN'T G 6B$ AT NI<T2 ,I'D
"W ALL NI<T4 ,OR1 NO MATT] H[ LATE MY
PLANE GOT 9 ! NI<T 2F1 ,I'D ALW 2 9 !
(FICE AT EI<T 9 ! MORN+4 ,I SPOKE #DAJ
"TS T YE>4 ,D Y ?9K T K9D ( DRIVE HAS
ANY?+ 6D ) GR[+ UP Z A * ( AN
ALCOHOLIC80
  ,JOE SIMPLY SD1 8,D BEES BE8 ,D BE>S
BE>80
  ,I GUESS 8 ANSW] 0 YES4
  ,MY SES.N ) ,JOE PROMPT$ A FLURRY (
MEMORIES4
  ,I REMEMB]$ H[ MY BRO!R'S FI.E _H
9VIT$ U 6H] *UR*1 A DENOM9,N DI6]5T F !
"O WE O/5SIBLY & LOOSELY 2L;G$ TO4 ,AL?
WE W5T RELUCTANTLY1 EV5TU,Y WE DID G4
,"!1 ,I MET A BUN* ( KIDS :O LAT] ASK$
MY DAD IF ,I CD -E 6*UR* CAMP ) !M4 ,&
,I W5T--B ONLY 2C ,DAD PROMIS$ ME A
PROFES.NAL FOOSBALL TA# = MY BIR?"D IF
,I'D G4
  ,I AGRE$ HESITANTLY4 ,& E "D ( MY LIFE
S9CE !N1 ,I'VE ?ANK$ ,GOD--& MY DAD--= T
FOOSBALL 9C5TIVE T S5T ME (F 6SP5D A
WEEK AT :AT ,I ?"\ WD RESEM# A MONA/]Y4
  ,2C AT T *UR* CAMP1 MY LIFE 0 *ANG$ 0!
MESSAGE (! SP1K] DUR+ ! LA/ EV5+'S
PROGRAM4 ,I CAME HOME F T CAMP A NEW
P]SON1 ALIVE 9 ,*RI/4 ,& :5 ,I %>$ MY
TE/IMONY ?REE "DS LAT] AT *UR*1 MY DAD
5?USIA/IC,Y RECOMMITT$ 8 [N LIFE 6,*RI/
AL4
  ,"K+ H[ MY [N LIFE *ANG$1 ,I "W N[
6"U/& & (F] HELP 6! "Y/]S :O >E / ON !
/RU7L+ SIDE ( PRO#MS L A4IC;N &
CODEP5D5CY4
  ,CODEP5D5TS SEEM 6BE RUL$ S SUBTLY F
*ILDHOOD 0^? ?REE SLOGANS3 ,DON'T FEEL1
DON'T TRU/1 DON'T TALK4 ,:AT "PICUL>LY
HIT ME AF MY TALK ) ,JOE 0 MY DEVO;N EV5
WELL 96ADULTHOOD 6T DE/RUCTIVE VOICE (
8,DON'T TELL40

    ,DON'T ,TELL ! ,,YFC
  ,"EY?+ HAPP5$ S E>LY = ME4 ,I 0 DO+
DRUGS 0AGE ?IRTE5 & _H REB.D$ F MY
SUICIDE ATTEMPTS 0! "T ,I 0 FIFTE54 ,!N1
9 HI< S*OOL1 ,I "W$ ) AN ORGANIZ,N CALL$
,Y\? = ,*RI/ 7,,YFC7 9 ,KANSAS ,C;Y &
TRAVEL$ 3/ANTLY 6SIMIL> ORGANIZ,NS ACR !
C.TRY4 ,REGIONAL DIRECTOR ,AL ,METSK]
ADOPT$ ME _SU,Y2 & ,I CUT MY TEE? LE>N+
6SP1K AT ,,YFC'S L>GE SIXTE5-HUNDR$-S1T
AUDITORIUM4 ;,AL W5T WAY \ ON A LIMB 9
AN ATTEMPT 6LAUN* ME 96M9I/RY 2F ,I H1D$
= SEM9>Y--OR Z HE CALL$ X1 2F 8CEMET]Y40
,HE ALL[$ ME 6SP1K AT A HI<LY PROMOT$
R,Y =! F/ "T :5 ,I 0 FIFTE51 & ,I
5?USIA/IC,Y %>$ ! MESSAGE (! ,GD ,NEWS4
  ,AT SIXTE51 ,I />T$ TRAVEL+ ) ,,YFC1
SP1K+ 6Y\? RALLIES1 CAMPS1 & 3V5;NS
N,NWIDE4 ,X 0 CLE> 6ME !N1 Z X HAS ALW
BE51 T ,GOD 0 US+ ME 2Y MY ABILITIES4
  ,S _M DOORS 7 OP5$1 SIMPLY 2C ,GOD 0
US+ ME 6C>RY ! MESSAGE T CD *ANGE LIVES4
,A NUMB] ( "TS :5 ,I WD R1* A KID :O
HE>D ME 9 8 HI< S*OOL & ATT5D$ \R EV5+
EV5T1 ,I WD 5D UP R1*+ 8 5TIRE FAMILY4
,X 0 REM>KA#4 ,I 0 2+ US$ 6R1* S _M P--B
,I CD N R1* MY MOM4
  ,! EXP]I;ES ( SP1K+ AT A PRE/IGI\S Y\?
M9I/RY AT S* A "Y AGE 7 MEMORIES N"E 6BE
=GOTT54 ;,AL 3T9U$ 6S*$ULE ME AT L1/
TWICE A YE> 6SP1K AT ! BIG R,Y ALL "? MY
HI< S*OOL YE>S4 ,EA* "T1 ,I WD TAKE
WEEKS 6PREP>E A SPECIAL MESSAGE4 ,I
CALL$ MY B$ROOM AT HOME 8,! ,BIG ;,D10 =
NO "U/&A# R1SON1 EXCEPT T X 0 BIG4 ,X WD
2 COV]$ ) OP5$ REF];E BOOKS1 WALL 6WALL1
& ,I WD F9I% (F MY RESE>* 0ACTU,Y
PRACTIC+ MY DELIV]Y 9 FRONT (! MIRROR ON
MY DRESS]4
  ,H[ ,I LOV$ ^? "DS6 ;,AL & ,VIDY
,METSK]1 _! SON ,RONNIE1 & ALL ! GANG AT
,,YFC 2CAME MY SECOND FAMILY 9 A HOME
AWAY F HOME4 ,I DIDN'T J ATT5D ! WEEKLY
R,Y1 B /AY$ H\RS AFW--UNTIL ! WEE H\RS 9
! MORN+--5JOY+ FELL[%IP ) "EY"O )A
*EESEBURG] & FRIES 9 MY H& 9 ! ADJO9+
,RA9B[ ,ROOM RE/AURANT4 ,MY ,SATUR"DS 7
ALW RES]V$ = ^? RALLIES4 ,SP1K+ AT !M 0
AN EXTRAORD9>Y HI<LI<T ( "S?+ ALR
-PLETELY SATISFY+ & 5T]TA9+ 6ME4
  ;,AL'S BACK+ & 3T9UAL PROMO;N ( ME
GAVE ME EXP]I;E F> 2Y MY YE>S4 ,0! 5D (
MY TWELF?-GRADE YE>1 ,I _H SPOK5 OV] A
?\S& "TS F ,NEW ,YORK 6,CALI=NIA4 ,X 0 9
^? "DS T ,I 2GAN MY EMBRYONIC ,LIFE
,S*OOL ,ASSEMBLY1 : 9 ! YE>S S9CE !N HAS
PLAC$ ME 2F ?REE MILLION "Y P 9 OV]
TW5TY-EI<T HUNDR$ PUBLIC-S*OOL CAMPUSES
ALL OV] ,NOR? ,AM]ICA4

    ,WALK
  ,AL ,METSK] 0 ! F/ P]SON :O _H ME SP1K
ON TELEVI.N1 RADIO1 AT 3V5;NS1 CAMP 7:
,AL ALW CALL$ A RAN*71 BANQUETS1 & E O!R
IMAG9A# SETT+4 ,HE TRULY 2LIEV$ 9 ME &!
GIFTS ,GOD _H GIV5 6ME4
  ,MY DAD & MOM ATT5D$ ! R,Y :5"E ,I
SPOKE4 ,X 0 A BIG ?+ 6ME HAV+ !M 9 !
AUDI;E4 ,?1 TOO1 PROVID$ ,DAD ) AN
EXCELL5T VEHICLE 6GET ,MOM EXPOS$ 6M (!
,BI#4
  ,DAD 2LIEV$ ,MOM 0 A G5U9E ,*RI/IAN1
EV5 ?\< %E /RU7L$ ) ALCOHOL4 ,HE 0 ALW
PRAY+ = H]1 ) H]1 & MODEL$ = ME ! P]FECT
EXAMPLE ( UNCONDI;NAL LOVE T[>D A SP\SE4
,DAD DID N LOVE ,MOM 2C ( H[ %E TR1T$
HM4 ,(T5 :5 ,MOM 0 DRUNK1 %E TR1T$ HM V
UNFAIRLY4 ,DAD LOV$ ,MOM 2C X 0 ! "R ?+
6D4 ,ALL AL;G HE 2LIEV$ ,GOD 0 GO+
6DELIV] H]4
  ,AT "O ,,YFC R,Y :5 ,I 0 SP1K+1 ,MOM 0
MOV$4 ,AFW1 ,I 0 SUMMON$ 6! C\NSEL+ >EA
2C ,MOM _H -E =W>D1 SEEK+ HELP4 ,I
REMEMB] RAC+ 6! C\NSEL+ >EA1 HOP+ ? 0 !
L;G-AWAIT$ BR1K"? WE 7 ALL DR1M+ =4
  8,I'M SORRY1 ,J]RY1 ,I'M SORRY4 ,PRAY
= ME10 ,MOM SD1 PL1D+ ) TE>S4 ,I WANT$ S
BADLY 62LIEVE ? 0 ! RECOV]Y WE _H ALL
BE5 PRAY+ =4 ,H["E1 ! >OMA ( ALCOHOL 0
ON ,MOM'S BR1?4 ,4APPO9T$1 ,I ALM HUNG
MY H1D4 ,!N RELUCTANTLY1 ,I =C$ \ A
PRAY]1 ASSUR$ ,MOM ?+S 7 GO+ 6GET BETT]1
& HELP$ H] F9D H] WAY BACK 6,DAD4
  ,0 ,I "E L[ T NI<T6 ,MY GRT MESSAGE _H
MOV$ ,MOM NO FUR!R ?AN REMORSE4 ,Z
HUMANS1 WE WANT 6BLAME \RVS :5 "S"O S
CLOSE 6U FAILS4 ,X'S "P (! CODEP5D5T'S
R\T9E4 ,MOM'S PROL;G$ DEF1T 0ALCOHOL
CAUS$ ME 6"Q ! P[] & VITAL;Y ( MY [N
_SUAL;Y4 ,Z ,I PILL[$ MY H1D M* LAT] T
NI<T 9 ! ,BIG ;,D1 MY MOM J D[N ! /AIRS
9 H] B$ROOM SLEEP+ X (F1 ,I RE,Y WOND]$
IF ?+S WD "E *ANGE4
  ,I _H SE5 ,GOD *ANGE ME F A WA/$1
SUICIDAL DRU7IE1 B ,I DIDN'T EV5 H !
FAI? T ,HE CD TRANS=M ,MOM4 ,Z F> Z ,I
CD REMEMB]1 MY MOM _H ALW BE5 AN
ALCOHOLIC4 ,& ,I ASSUM$ %E WD ALW 2 "O4
  ,AT EI<TE51 ,I RCVD A SEV5-YE> ALL-
EXP5SE-PD S*OL>%IP 6A ,*RI/IAN COLLEGE &
SEM9>Y4 ,I A3EPT$1 & :ILE ,I 0 9 S*OOL1
,I 0 PUT ON SAL>Y & TURN$ MY HONOR>IUMS
BACK 9 6! ORGANIZ,N4 ,MON?LY1 ,I SPOKE
ON ! RADIO NET"W SYNDICAT$ 6NE>LY F\R
HUNDR$ /,NS N,N,Y :ILE GO+ 6S*OOL4 ,I 0
F1TUR$ )A FEW O!RS ON ! TELEVI.N
BROADCA/4
  ,A NUMB] ( "TS "? ! YE>S ,I WD SP1K 9
,KANSAS ,C;Y & ,DAD & ,MOM WD -E HE> ME4
,B APP>5TLY NO?+ ,I SD 0 REVOLU;NIZ+
,MOM'S LIFE4 ,I CDN'T R1* H]4
  ,:Y8 ,I DIDN'T RE,Y "K1 B X DEEPLY
BO!R$ ME4 ,%ORTLY AF ,I _H 2COME A
,*RI/IAN & MY DAD RECOMMITT$ 8 LIFE
6,*RI/1 HE WROTE 9 MY ,BI#1 8,IF Y C'T 2
A SU3ESS 9 ! M9I/RY 9 YR HOME1 Y W N"E 2
\TSIDE (! HOME40 ,:AT ,DAD M1NT 0 IF Y
DON'T H RAPPORT )1 &! RESPECT (1 ^?
CLOSE/ 6Y & :O "K Y BE/1 Y W N"E G>N] !
RESPECT ( O!RS4
  ,_M "TS ,I FAIL$ MY FAMILY 9 TRY+ 6BE
A GD EXAMPLE4
  ,E "T ? HAPP5$1 X GRIEV$ ME4 ,S"EAL
"TS "? ! YE>S ,I 0 PROMPT$ 6APOLOGIZE
6DI6]5T "OS 9 MY FAMILY & 6PL1D = _!
PRAY] SUPPORT T ,I CD AVOID ! PITFALLS (
HYPOCRISY4 ,MY MOM RESPECT$ ME1 "U/OOD
MY CALL+1 & KNEW ,I 0 IMP]FECT & GR[+4
,N"E!.S1 MY /R;GE/ ATTEMPT 6R1* H]
FAIL$4
  ,H"O/LY1 ,I ALM GAVE UP4 ,T[>D ! 5D1
:5 %E 0 AT H] WOR/ 3DI;N1 ,I F.D MYF
M5T,Y BRAC+ =! CATA/ROPHIC4
  ,I 0 AFRAID WE 7 GO+ 6LOSE H]4 ,ALL
AL;G1 MY DAD TRIUMPHANTLY _H FAI? T ,GOD
CD *ANGE ,MOM'S LIFE & -PLETELY H1L H] (
? WRET*$ A4IC;N4 ,& IF Y H AN IMPOSSI#
CASE 9 YR FAMILY Y M/ 2LIEVE1 TOO1 J Z
,DAD DID6 ,Y M/ H FAI? T ,GOD C A3OMPLI%
! IMPOSSI#4
  ,9 RETROSPECT1 X IS S EASY 6SEE N[ H[
,GOD 0 GUID+ \R PA?S ALL AL;G4 ,EV5 :5
WE 7 AT \R MO/ T5U\S MO;TS1 WE _H AN
UNSE5 P]SON /&+ NEXT 6U1 OR*E/RAT+ ALL !
EV5TS = \R ULTIMATE GD4
  ,B ,I N"E RE,Y TOLD ANY"O AT ,,YFC AB
,MOM4 ,X SEEM$ /RANGE 2C !Y 7 ALL S
CLOSE 6ME4 ,B X 0 H>D 6BE T H"O/4 ,P]H
!Y KNEW1 "SH[4 ,IF !Y DID1 !Y N"E LET
ON4
  ,& "U ! LOAD (! :OLE ?+1 ,I RE,Y WANT$
6TELL "S"O4 ,B ? 0 S* AN 8UNM5;NA#40 ,X
0 ! ,JOHN/ON FAMILY'S CLOSELY GU>D$
SECRET4

    ,KEEP+ ! ,SECRET ,EV5 9 ,ROM.E
  ,I _H A GRT DESIRE 6R1* P F ! MO;T ,I
0 TURN$ >.D AT CAMP4 ,I "K T ONLY ,GOD
PROMOTES A MAN1 BUILDS A C;Y1 & LAUN*ES
A M9I/RY4 ,L1V+ COLLEGE & RETURN+ HOME 0
AN ID1L HIATUS 6LOOK H1V5-W>D = DIV9E
DIREC;N4
  ,AF ,I LEFT COLLEGE1 ,I _H A S*$UL$
5GAGE;T 9 ! SMALL T[N ( ,HOLL&1
,MI*IGAN1 ": ,I 0 6SP1K AT A ,SATUR"D-
NI<T Y\? R,Y1 & AG ON ,SUN"D MORN+4
,SUN"D EV5+ WE WD W9D UP SP1K+ 9
,DETROIT4
  ,? 0 A V SPECIAL "T 9 MY LIFE4 ,AF
L1V+ COLLEGE1 ,I DET]M9$ 6PRAY
EXT5SIVELY = ,GOD 6USE ME 9 A UNIQUE
WAY4
  ,& T'S EXACTLY :AT ,I DID = S"EAL "DS4
  ,! ,BIG ;,D _H A L>GE WALK-IN CLOSET4
,:5 ! CLOSET DOOR 0 %UT1 X 0 PIT* BLACK
& V QUIET4 ,ON MY KNEES 9 T QUIET1
PRIVATE B$ROOM CLOSET ,I _SU,Y GL[$ L A
HOT COAL4 ,:AT ,GOD 0 SAY+ 6ME 0
9EXPRESSI#4 ,9 MY HE>T1 ,I KNEW ,HE 0
*>T+ MY C\RSE4 ,A _S ( RENEW$ 3FID;E
CAME OV] ME4 ,I ANN\NC$ 6MY DAD ON ! WAY
6,KANSAS ,C;Y ,9T]N,NAL ,AIRPORT MY
FIRME/ 3VIC;N T ,GOD _H "S SPECIAL MIS.N
= ME 6A3OMPLI%4 ,WE PRAY$ 9 ! C> ON !
WAY 6! AIRPORT1 Z WE H D"O _M "TS S9CE1
& ,I OPTIMI/IC,Y BO>D$ ! PLANE =
,MI*IGAN4
  ,*RIS ,HUF 0 A B1UTI;L N9ETE5-YE>-OLD
F NE>BY1 OBSCURE ,BORCULO1 ,MI*IGAN4 ,H]
"F _H IMMIGRAT$ 6! ,UNIT$ ,/ATES F
,CZE*OSLOVAKIA4 ,ESCAP+ 8 -MUNI/ HOMEL&
9 #AIDI1 HE MET A "Y WOMAN "ND ,POLDI 9
,WE/ ,G]_M4 ,!Y W$ & SOON CELEBRAT$ !
BIR? ( ,JANA1 ! F/ ( _! SIX *N4 ,A
FAI?;L1 ELD]LY MIS.N>Y 0! "N ( ,LUKE%
%>$ ! ,GD ,NEWS )! /RU7L+ "Y C\PLE1 & !Y
TURN$ 6,GOD = NEW LIFE4 ,/IFL$ 0AN
5VIRON;T ": !Y FELT X 0 UNA3EPTA# 6GR[
_SU,Y1 & AID$ 0,LUKE%1 ! "Y ,HUFS LEFT =
! ,UNIT$ ,/ATES1 L1V+ FAMILY & FRS 2H4
  ,HUDSONVILLE-,BORCULO1 A PREDOM9ANTLY
,DUT* -MUN;Y NE/L$ "U ! BRIM ( GRT] ,GR&
,RAPIDS'S RELIGI\S HALO1 WELCOM$ !
,HUFS4 ,/>T+ F SCRAT*1 !Y 2GAN RE>+ _!
FAMILY & TRY+ _! H& AT ! FREE-5T]PRISE
SY/EM4
  ,2C A FR WD N /OP PE/]+ ,AL ,HUF
6ATT5D S]VICES 9 ,HOLL& ": A N9ETE5-YE>-
OLD F ,KANSAS 0 SP1K+1 HE 2GRUDG+LY
AGRE$ 6-E1 M \ ( LOYALTY 6! MAN ?AN
CURIOS;Y =! "Y UP/>T4
  ;,AL LAT] DESCRIB$ HMF AT T PO9T Z
_SU,Y S.D--S.D ASLEEP4 ,9 A S5SE1 T
DESCRIP;N MIRROR$ ! 5TIRE -MUN;Y4 ,"! 0
A GRT D1L ( EXT]IOR %[ ( RELIGION4
,ATT5D+ *UR* FAI?;LLY1 ,BI# R1D+ AF
D9N]1 &A FAMILY PRAY] OR TWO )\T F]V5CY
F ! HE>T 7 3SPICU\S 9 M ?AN "O FAMILY4
  ,! TWO MEET+S T 7 S*$UL$ = ,HOLL&
EXT5D$ SPONTANE\SLY = NE>LY ?REE WEEKS4
,!Y ELECTRIFI$ ,AL ,HUF4 ,HE 2GAN 6ATT5D
E NI<T4 ,& EA* NI<T1 HE BE7$ "S ( 8
FAMILY MEMB]S 6ATT5D1 ,*RIS 0 ! ONLY
TAK]4 ,H"O/LY1 ,I NOTIC$ ,*RIS F !
PLAT=M6 ,\R REL,N%IP N1TLY FIT ! 8LOV-
1T-F/-SI<T0 CATEGORY4
  ,P CAME F ALL OV] WE/]N ,MI*IGAN
6ATT5D ! ,HOLL& MEET+S4 ,0! SECOND
,SUN"D1 ! BUILD+ 0 JAMM$ 6CAPAC;Y6 ,)
,*RIS 2S HM1 ,AL IMM]S$ HMF 9 ! MEET+S &
ATT5D$ NI<TLY4 ,"O EV5+1 HE WAIT$ AF !
S]VICE 69TRODUCE ,*RIS & HMF 6ME4
  ,! LA/ NI<T (! MEET+S1 ,AL 9VIT$ ME
6-E OV] & MEET 8 5TIRE FAMILY4 8,IS
,*RIS GO+ 6BE "!80 ,I ASK$4 8,%E SURE
IS60 HE ASSUR$ ME4 ,F T NI<T ON1 ,I 2GAN
! GRTE/ C\RT%IP ( MY LIFE4 ,*RIS 0 S
S5SITIVE1 S G5U9E1 & S UNASSUM+4
  ,& H] DAD & MOM 7 J L H]4
  ,E>LY 9 \R REL,NS ,AL & ,POLDI SAT
,*RIS & ME D[N & ,AL SD1 8,J]RY1 WE H
"S?+ WE NE$ 6TELL Y4 ,WE L Y V M*4 ,& WE
>E HAPPY ,*RIS IS SEE+ Y4 ,B WE H MADE
UP \R M9DS IF ,*RIS WD "E GET 9 ! WAY (
:AT Y >E DO+ = ,GOD1 WE WANT ? :OLE
REL,N%IP /OPP$40
  ,I CD TELL F ! T"O ( _! VOICES !Y M1NT
E ^W4
  ,? 0 EXTREMELY S]I\S 6!M4 8,YR R1*+
KIDS IS M IMPORTANT ?AN DAT+ ,*RIS10 ,AL
R1SON$4
  ,WELL1 ,*RIS 0 X = ME4 ,%E CAPTUR$ ME4
,ALM ANY "D ,I _H (F ,I FLEW 6,GR&
,RAPIDS 6SEE H]4 ,I DIDN'T WANT 6WE> \
MY WELCOME1 B MY "T ) ,*RIS 0 PRICE.S4
,MY DAD & MOM KNEW ,I _H FALL5 9 LOVE4
8,:5 Y N"E CAME HOME AG1 WE KNEW Y 7 9
LOVE10 ,DAD LAT] SD4
  ,GR& ,RAPIDS 0 AN ADJU/;T = ME ON MY
VISITS 6SEE ,*RIS4 ,X 0 A SL[]-PAC$
PLACE1 N TAK5 TO 8\TSID]S10 "PICUL>LY "Y
_SUAL MAV]ICKS4 ,B :5 ,*RIS 0 A4$ 96!
EQU,N1 X 0 ! BE/ C;Y 9 ,AM]ICA4 ,WE (T5
W5T 6! MALLS & ALW VISIT$ ! BOOK/ORES1
MY "O & ONLY HO2Y4
  ,*RIS'S P>5TS 2CAME V CLOSE 6ME1 MO/LY
2C X 0 S EASY 6TALK 6!M4 ,!Y 7 HUM# P1 &
WE _H GRT "TS TGR4
  ,B ,I N"E TOLD ,*RIS OR H] DAD & MOM T
MY MOM 0 AN ALCOHOLIC4 ,I CDN'T4 ,& X 0
WR;G ( ME N 64CLOSE X4
  ,I PLANN$ ,*RIS'S F/ VISIT 6MEET MY
P>5TS 9 ,KANSAS ,C;Y4
  ,%E WD -E ON ,HALL[E51 ,OCTOB] #CA4 ,Y
WD H ?"\ ! PRESID5T 0 -+ 6T[N4 ,I CL1N$
MY MOM'S H\SE TOP 6BOTTOM1 EV5 !
TOILETS4 ,T 0 A F/6
  ,MY P>5TS /OOD BACK 9 AMAZE;T4 ,I
PLANN$ "EY?+ 6A ,T4 ,I MADE CLE> 6,MOM T
%E1 ,DAD1 ,*RIS1 & ,I WD EAT 9 ! =MAL
D9+ ROOM1 & WE WD H BOIL$ %RIMP4 ,MOM'S
PICTURESQUE D9+ ROOM 0 N"E US$ 9 ^? "DS4
,MR4 ,ALCOHOL USU,Y KEPT ,MOM F> TOO
BUSY 65T]TA9 ANY"O4 ,\R %UT-UP H\SE RCVD
V FEW VISITORS4
  ,MOM ROLL$ \ ! R$ C>PET = MY B1UTI;L
VISITOR4 ,"EY?+ 0 P]FECT4 ,NO?+ CD SPOIL
? GRT CELEBR,N4 ,*RIS L&$ AT ,,KCI1 ,I
PICK$ H] UP1 & WE 7 (F 6\R DELECTA#
D9N]4 ,I ASSUM$ "EY"O KNEW H[ 6EAT BOIL$
%RIMP6 ,B ,*RIS PUT A %ELL$ %RIMP 9 H]
M\? & ALM 2GAN *OMP+ :51 9 ! NICK ( "T1
,I S5S$ H] TIMID;Y & GAVE H] DE-%ELL+
9/RUC;NS4 ,I C]TA9LY SAV$ H] 9DIGES;N6
  ,"! WE W]E1 AT ,MOM'S D9+-ROOM TA#1
GETT+ 6"K "O ANO!R--ME GL[+ 2S ,*RIS4
  ,!N ,MOM />T$ CRY+4 ,GRT1 ,I ?"\ 9
4GU/4 ,N N[6
  ,:AT IF ,*RIS SUSPECTS "S?+'S WR;G8
,*RIS SEEM$ 69T]PRET ,MOM'S TE>S Z AN
9DIC,N ( H] HAPPI;S ) \R UNION4 ,N[1
YE>S LAT]1 ,I F9D MYF / WOND]+ AT "TS :Y
,MOM REACT$ Z %E DID "U ALCOHOL2 ,I
DIDN'T RE,Y "K :Y %E 0 CRY+4
  ,LAT] T NI<T1 ,*RIS & ,I WALK$ >.D !
BLOCK4 ,I KNEW %E NE$$ "S EXPLAN,N4 ,:Y
_H ,I WAIT$ S L;G 6TELL "S"O S CLOSE
6ME8 ,) MY /OMA* *URN+1 ,I =C$ X \3 8,MY
MOM IS DR9K+4 ''' ,%E'S AN ALCOHOLIC4
  8,B PL1SE DON'T TELL ANY"O1 N EV5 YR
P>5TS10 ,I PL1D$4
  ,X DIDN'T FAZE ,*RIS "O IOTA4 ,%E
PL$G$ H] C>E & LOVE & PRAY]S = ,MOM4 ,&
AG/ MY ADVICE1 %E LAT] RETURN$ HOME &
TOLD H] DAD & MOM4 ,& ,*RIS'S MOM & DAD
IMMLY />T$ PRAY+4 ,F ! 2G9N+1 !Y C>$4
,9T]E/+LY1 !Y N"E LOOK$ AT ,MOM )
3DEMN,N4 ,6!M1 %E 0 N BAD OR "S TYPE (
VILE P]SON4 ,%E _H A PRO#M2 X ELICIT$ _!
G5U9E1 HE>T-FELT SYMPA?Y4
  ,B ,I WOND] :AT X SAYS AB MY T5D5CY
T[>D CODEP5D5CY T ,I1 MYF1 N"E (FICI,Y
AC"KL$G$ 6,*RIS'S P>5TS T MY MOM 0 AN
ALCOHOLIC4 ,!Y LE>N$ X F ,*RIS1 & !N
SIMPLY RESPOND$ ) LOVE & SUPPORT4
  ,LAT]1 ,*RIS & ,I M>RI$ & 7 B.S$ 6H
,DANIELLE1 ,J]EMIAH1 & ,J5ILEE4 ,I WD
LE>N ) M* PA9 T ,MR4 ,ALCOHOL WD PREV5T
,MOM F 2+ A G5U9E GR&"M4 ,S _M "TS1 %E
WASN'T "! = MY KIDS4 ,:5"E %E ATT5D$ A
BIR?"D "PY1 %E /AY$ ONLY A BRIEF "T2 !
BOTTLE 0 CALL+4 ,*RIS & ,I N"E TOLD !
KIDS UNTIL WE LAT] 9T]V5$ ) ,MOM & !Y
WANT$ 6"K :Y ,GR&MA 0 9 ! HOSPITAL4
  ,9 SPITE ( ,MOM'S DEP5D5CY ON !
BOTTLE1 ,I LOV$ H]4 ,MY 4APPO9T;T1
REGRET1 & EV5 AT "TS EMB>RASS;T N"E
CAUS$ MY LOVE = H] 64SIPATE4 ,I ALW TOLD
H] ,I LOV$ H]4 ,:5 ,*RI/MAS ROLL$ >.D1
,I ALW TRI$ 6BUY H] ! BE/ GIFT4 ,MY LOVE
WANT$ H] FREE1 N 5SLAV$4